A helpful 101 guide for rooting out fatphobia in yourself
•Stop commenting on or bringing up other people’s weight changes. Seriously, full stop. There’s no way to do this well. “Compliments” about weight changes do not exist. Just. Don’t. Comment. On. Weight.
•Simply don’t point out, talk about, mock, or make fun of fat people, NO MATTER HOW FAT THEY ARE. (I can’t believe I have to say that.)
•Stop commenting negatively about your own body size/shape. If you need to speak with someone about this, like a therapist, please do. Society is fatphobic as fuck so it’s natural to have internalized fatphobia and have bad body feelings. But to the absolute best of your abilities, do not pollute public air space with your body negativity. This mentality is often LEARNED from others and you don’t need to be another voice in the chorus teaching fatphobia.
•Stop commenting on other people’s food choices, diets, etc. It’s not your place.
•ENTIRELY remove the words “obese” (based on junk BMI nonsense) and “overweight” (over WHAT weight?) from your vocabulary.
•Do not place morality on simply eating. Stop saying things like “I’m being bad today” when eating a treat or saying you feel “guilty” for eating certain stuff. (Or the opposite that you’re being “good” when you eat a salad.) Eating is necessary for your body! And it’s allowed to be enjoyable.
•STOP FRAMING EXERCISE AS PUNISHMENT YOU INFLICT ON YOUR BODY FOR EATING. Exercise because you find activities you enjoy! Exercise because working out your body makes you feel strong or powerful! That’s all great! Shut the hell up about “working off that donut.”
•If someone not fat uses fat as an insult or says they “FEEL FAT” (god I hate that phrase) shut it down. It can be as simple as “That’s not cool, please don’t use fat as an insult.” If you don’t feel comfortable shutting it down then literally just do not say anything. Don’t encourage or engage in the discussion. AND! Please! For the love of god! Don’t be all “you’re not fat, you’re beautiful.”
•If someone who IS fat says they’re fat for the love of god again DON’T SAY “you’re not fat, you’re beautiful.”
•Understand and accept that your body is fully yours but ONLY your body is yours and you have no right to judge what someone else does to theirs. Have I mentioned that society is fatphobic as fuck…so judgy thoughts about other people’s food or clothing choices happen, but when these thoughts emerge, remind yourself: that is THEIR body. Not yours.
•Accept that there’s no wrong way to have a body. Everyone already has a “beach body” or a “bikini body” if they want to. An “athletic body type” is any body playing a sport. YOU might think “she doesn’t have the body to pull off that outfit” but SHE obviously disagrees, so mind your own business.
•If you are not fat yourself, shop at size inclusive retailers. If you won’t shop from someplace that someone who wears a XXXL can’t shop from, you’ll develop some empathy for this topic reeeeeal quickly.
•If you are not fat and you’re going out with friends/family who are, think in advance about how they can be accommodated. Has your fat friend commented on the uncomfortable, narrow booths at the restaurant you’re meeting her at for dinner before? Request a table and not a booth when you check in at the host stand. Or asking your fat friend out for a shopping trip—does the store have things she can buy too?
•Accept that you are being brainwashed to believe fat is bad and you better never be it if you want to be loved, if you want to have a fulfilling life, etc so that someone can try to make money off you.